Accepting a diagnosis: The ASD minefield

I thought I was prepared for George’s diagnosis of ASD. I’d read countless articles, scientific books and educational journals, Temple Grandin’s Thinking in Pictures and endless blogs by parents who were going through the same thing as me. I felt confident that I was armed with enough knowledge to equip me in taking Autism head on. And in many ways, I was.

It was a relief to hear the Paediatrician confirm my suspicions when George was just 2 and a half, (he is now turning 5). I’d learned that an early diagnosis was important; it meant he would now be able to access the professional help that was beyond what I could give him alone. I felt sure that this official ‘label’ – as it is quite often referred to – could only be a good thing, and I looked at his future in a more positive light. What I wasn’t prepared for was the sympathetic, pitiful reactions of others when I revealed that George is Autistic.

Here I was, full of relief, knowledge and positivity, yet we’d get ‘Oh what a shame, poor thing’. I found it all quite baffling, and soon realised that the general attitude towards Autism was a negative one.

Slowly it began to dawn on me. Not everyone had done the research. Most people were clueless about Autism, and who could blame them? I was too until it became part of our lives. So I decided not to let the negative attitudes get to me and instead focus on how I could include George in ‘normal’ activities and break down the barriers in our communication. I turned to other parents in online forums in the hope that they would empathise and understand. Most offered some great advice and pointed me in the right direction for therapies and strategies that have worked for them. But I also came across an alarming number of websites and group pages dedicated to ‘curing’ their children of Autism, promoting products as some kind of miracle potion.

The difficult thing about Autism is, there’s no guidance on the best therapy or treatment, there’s there’s no medication or miracle ‘cure’. And some parents can’t accept that.

It’s a sensitive subject. Parents instinctively want to help their children, whatever the cost or personal sacrifice. Services and support can be slow and hard to find. Professionals confuse with their jargon and referrals. But its difficult to maintain a positive attitude towards Autism if you’re constantly looking to ‘fix’ it. Why should a child be fixed to fit others’ perception of what is normal?

Instead we as parents, teachers, family and friends, as communities….as society, should adapt, adjust, evolve.

To fix something is to suggest that it is broken. My boy is not broken, he’s beautiful.